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| top, anagram, mother, group, deedat, net, movie times, restaurants, bad, mother sucks son, foia, advertisements, odbc, marketing, dvd, community, store ratings, brand positioning, wa, | Example: Marketing Analyst: "Oh noes, our competitor came out with a razor with 3 blades and a grip that the hip chow youngins think is "cool"." chow Marketing Manager: "Up the R&D funding! Man the battle stations! Get the engineers! What do we do???" Some idiot: "Uh...how about a fourth blade and a cooler grip and some fancy sounds on the commercial?" Marketing Manager: "Brilliant! Launch it!" Me: "Uhh, maybe there's a better way to go." Marketing Manager: "FIRED! FOUR BLADES DAMMIT!" Seriously, what chow in the goddamn hell? Think outside the fucking box for 3 fucking seconds. And for Christ's sake, don't just put lightning on the box and call it XTREME. The next fucking time I see something marketed as XTREME, I'm gonna strangle a small woodland creature. |
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| In one night, stoned, by myself, I could come up with a profoundly more interesting and attention-grabbing marketing campaign for virtually any company that uses television commercials. I need the name of the net product, its function, its history, the target demographic, some paper, net and a goddamn pencil. I guaran-fucking-tee it. Let me bring in a few of my friends with a case of beer, and I assure that we'll win the Commercial Campaign of the Year award, if it even exists. I would assume it exists, net but if it doesn't, maybe that would be a good place to start. AWARD PEOPLE THAT DON'T SUCK! Make marketing a freelance profession instead of have 3 million dollars of salary earmarked for the brain-dead assholes in a marketing department that sit in their cubicles jerking off to Internet porn until the clock strikes 5. If marketing was freelance, companies would be approached with creative ideas instead of listening to the same assholes spew out just enough crap to keep their jobs. |
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