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You can’t fake that.” El Bingeroso “This is not going to end well.” Hate “Max, just when I think you’ve tapped out, you find a whole new way to fuck up!” Tucker “Fuck you. I hope all of your children have birth defects.” I agreed to meet Fat Girl at a bar in Durham, The James Joyce. I flatly refused to kwiatkowski tell any of my friends where we were meeting, kwiatkowski and made them promise not to come kwiatkowski looking for me, in case she turned out to be morbidly obese, as opposed to just normal fat, like in her picture. Like an IDIOT, I didn’t think about extracting promises for what would happen after the date. A rookie mistake that will haunt me my entire life. Fat Girl was there when I got there, and looked pretty much exactly like she did in the picture--fat.
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